Crap words and music by Scott Yoho

As I was walking with my dog the other day
I saw this woman from the coffee shop
Things started fine, I even found something to say
But her eyes fell to my hand and then her jaw just dropped

There in my hand I held a little bag of crap
My dog excretes, I clean it up, what could be simpler than that?
She was disgusted with me, like I'd planned his excrement
Would she have rather that I left it in her path right where he went?

As it turned out our meeting really made her day
She told the comic tale to all her friends:
This loser had the nerve to make a pass her way
The coffee shop explodes when they hear how it ends

Sometimes I feel just like that little bit of crap
Maligned, misunderstood and trapped in a sweaty plastic sack
I get these looks as if I smell of canine excrement
Regardless that my dog's at home and hasn't gone as yet

©1999 Auto Order Music (BMI)

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